Michael Nicolson the Rockyboy2 mans Blog

Latest big Thing coming to the Internet soon

2007-12-29T04:47:00.000-08:00

Get this widget!

Fun at the Office in Lunchbreak

2007-10-07T05:19:00.000-07:00

Having fun at the office during lunch break

YouTube - Alter Bridge-Open Your Eyes

2007-09-23T14:57:00.000-07:00

YouTube - Alter Bridge-Open Your Eyes

Google Adsense sucks

2007-03-22T12:32:00.000-07:00

Google Adsense sucks. Yeah the comment I received earlier is so true,Google Adsense Sucks
But I love Google because they made billions. Now I use Big Daddy search It pays me
for searching. It pays ME for just signing up It is revolutionising the way we search
OK I suppose google will buy them out one day but until then Rock On Big Daddy

Love

2007-01-21T15:02:00.000-08:00

Love is divine, love is awesome, love moves worlds
Without love we are an empty meaningless shell
With love we are a blossoming flower, a fireball of emotion
For love we would give up everything
For love we would do anything
Love is sweet honey, the nectre of the Gods
That moment when first our true loves eyes and thine own meet
That instant, that fleeting moment that time stands still
Wanting to hold your love, touch your love
Feel your loves touch, their kiss
I know for I have been in love many times
Love will come for you if you give love
Love will come for you if you radiate love
a peom off the cuff by Michael Nicolson
Feel free to use it

technorati

2006-12-28T11:40:00.000-08:00

Technorati Profile

Life

2006-12-02T16:18:00.000-08:00

Life

In our daily lives, we tend to forget and take for granted things around us..
I would like to share the below stories with you. Some of us may have already
received it..

There was a blind girl who hated herself just
because she's blind.
She hated everyone, except her loving boyfriend.
He's always there for her.

She said that if she could only see the world, she
would marry her boyfriend.
One day, someone donated a pair of eyes to her and
then she can see everything, including her boyfriend.

Her boyfriend asked her, "Now that you can see the
world, will you marry me?" The girl was shocked when she saw that her
boyfriend is blind too, and refused to marry him.

Her boyfriend walked away in tears, and later wrote
a letter to her saying. "Just take care of my eyes dear."
This is how human brain changes when the status changed.

Only few remember what life was before, and who's
always been there even in the most painful situations.

Life Is A Gift

Today before you think of saying an unkind word -
Think of someone who can't speak.

Before you complain about the taste of your food -
Think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about your husband or wife -
Think of someone who's crying out to God for a companion.

Today before you complain about life
Think of someone who went too early to heaven.

Before you complain about your children
Think of someone who desires children but they're barren.

Before you argue about your dirty house, someone
didn't clean or sweep -
Think of the people who are living in the streets.

Before whining about the distance you drive -
Think of someone who walks the same distance with their feet.

And when you are tired and complain about your job
Think of the unemployed, the disabled and those who wished they
had your job.

But before you think of pointing the finger or condemning another -
Remember that not one of us are without sin and we all answer to one maker.

And when depressing thoughts seem to get you down -
Put a smile on your face and thank God you're alive and still around.

When you are sucessful, surrounded with riches and good things in life
Give thanks, t and spare a thought for those who

Life is a gift, Live it, Enjoy it, Celebrate it,
And fulfill it.
Come what may, we never know what tommorrow brings
As it is, life is very fragile. Treasure it.

Regards,
Michael Nicolson

Blogging

2006-12-02T15:20:00.000-08:00

Blogging

If writing is an art, then, blogging is one way of using words to come up with an art. This is because people who are into blogging are the ones who are artistic on their own sense, carefully choosing words that would best describe their feelings, sentiments, wishes, desires, and everything.

Basically, blogs were first introduced as weblogs that refer to a “server’s log file.” It was created when web logging hit the virtual market. Since its inception in the mid-1990s, web logging gradually saturated the virtual community making the Internet a viable source of greater information.

However, with web logging, you still need a web site and domain names, but with blogging, you do not need anything just an account with blog providers. In most cases, these kinds of blogs are free of charge.

With the onset of blogging in the industry, personal journaling had been a common ground for people who wish to be known all over the world. However, not literally famous as this is not a case on being popular or well-known personality.

Generally, blogs are created for personal use. Like a journal, people can write their daily adventures, sentiments, and whatever ideas they want to express online.

Nevertheless, with the advent of the online businesses, blogs had gradually taken the limelight in providing businesses a chance to boost their productivity online. This is where the business blogs have taken the limelight.

Business blogs are, basically, created to advertise the services or products of a certain web site or online business in order to increase online sales.

Moreover, business blogs are also one way of promoting the company so that the other readers will know that a certain company exists online. With blogs, entrepreneurs are able to establish a name in the virtual market through articles that can be very useful in the reader’s life.

From there, you can make money out of blogs by simply syndicating it to your business’ web site. This can be done through the RSS technology.

So, if you are thinking to create a blog, whether for business or for pleasure, you need to know some tips that could help you get through and make your blog one of the interesting blogs online.

Here’s how:

1. Consider your audience

Even if your blog is generally personal, still, it would be better to consider the minds of your readers. You have to think of something that would interest them.

After all, most of the reasons of people who write blogs are not at all confined to their own personal motives. Most of them would love to be “heard” (or read) and would love to be known, in some way or another, even for just a minute. Hence, it is very important to come with a write up that everybody can understand, not necessarily that these people can relate to it but they can understand it.

2. Pictures speaks a thousand words

To make your blogging worth the browsing effort of your readers, it would be extremely nice if you will put some pictures in it. It does not necessarily mean you have to place a picture of yourself. Any photographs will do as long as it does not pose danger or insult to anyone who will be reading your blog.

3. Make constructive and beneficial blogs

Even if you are free to write anything you wan to say to the world, still, it would be better to create some write-ups that would be beneficial to your readers.

After all, its information technology that you have there so better be inclined to provide information rather than sheer quirky entertainment.

4. Avoid making multifaceted and complicated blogs

In order to have an interesting blogs, try not to use some highly technical and highfalutin words. After all, it is not a science discourse or a debate that you are making, so better stick to simple facts and short blogs.

Bear in mind that most people who use the Internet usually do more scanning than scrutinizing each site word for word. Therefore, it would be better to come with blogs that will not bore your readers just because you have these lengthy articles.

5. Make it interactive

As much as possible and if your capacity will allow it, make your blog interactive. Yu can do this by placing some video or audio clips in your blog.

You can even place an area for comments or for some feedbacks. In this way, you can get some impressions or reactions of other people. Who knows, you might even gain some friends just by making them feel at home in your blog site.

Indeed, blogs are not created just for the mere fun of it. It also has its own purpose in the world of the Internet.
Therefore, for people who wish to harness their craft, as far as writing is concerned, blogs are the best way to do it.

As they say, blogging is the contemporary term of creative and commercial writing.

Michael Nicolson the Rockyboy2 mans Blog: Extract from my latest Novel Unfinished

2006-10-11T12:23:00.000-07:00

Michael Nicolson the Rockyboy2 mans Blog: Extract from my latest Novel Unfinished

Extract from my latest Novel Unfinished

2006-10-11T12:15:00.000-07:00

Rockyboy2 The Quest to Save The World

A novel by Michael Nicolson

Copywrite protected do not copy or reproduce or face legal action nicolsonmarketing2006

Chapter1. April showers

The rain was falling in great sheets as the wind gathered pace. Rocky pulled the hood of his black parka up around his head and scurried towards the car park. The car park was almost empty, except for a beaten up white Ford Transit van parked over in the far corner under a large Oak tree. As he unlocked the driver's door of his silver Astra car he felt a premonition of dread sweep over him and he let out an involuntary shudder as he quickly closed the door. Reaching into the glove compartment he pulled out a half empty packet of Marlboro Lights. Struggling to find his lighter he switched on the engine and turned on the heater, as he pulled away slowly, pushing the black knob of the cars lighter in, he noticed how old his hands were beginning to look.

"Must get some hand cream on when I get home."

He said aloud, looking at his face in the mirror. Still not bad for a fifty something, he thought, as he pulled out of the pub car park. The cars lighter made a soft click as it signalled it was ready. Lighting his cigarette he pulled out into the slip road and entered the motorway, heading back to his hotel.

The journey back to the hotel was only about five miles, in good weather it would have taken about ten minutes. Taking a deep drag on his Marlboro he started to think about how Jenny and the kids were coping without him. The course was about women’s rights and equal opportunities. Woman’s rights, Jesus, he thought, Jenny wouldn't last five minutes if anything happened to me, send her out for bread and milk and she would come back with a packet of biscuits, still he didn't marry her for her brain, he did love her, but he was one of the old school, a women’s place was at home, cooking and fucking and bringing up the kids. Straining to see the turnoff exit for the hotel in the driving rain, he was startled by a loud bang coming from the roof of his car. He almost lost control of the car and swerved slightly, just missing a huge lorry. The lorry driver blasted his horn furiously at Rocky. As Rocky gave him the finger and shouted, “fucking wanker,” he noticed the flashing neon light of the Holiday Inn Hotel and pulled off the motorway.

"Hope you die you fucker." He shouted, as he watched the Lorries tail lights disappear into the distance. The hotel car park was fairly full and he could only park about two hundred metres from the entrance. Turning off the engine he lit another cigarette and turned on the radio. It was an old tune that was playing, heavy metal; he turned up the volume as he was still feeling aggressive after his close encounter with the lorry. Singing along to the tune and shaking his head from side to side

"Killing your self to live, Killing yourself to fucking live"

Rocky brushed the ash from his clothes and took another deep drag of his cigarette.

As the music blasted out from the car radio he noticed blood dripping down the windscreen.

"What the fuck!" He said, getting out of the car to investigate, the rain had stopped now but it was still cold and windy.

Jammed onto the top of the car roof rack was the body of a huge blackbird, the force of the impact had left a huge dent in the roof, he stared at the dead lifeless black eyes. Black Sabbath, he just remembered who the heavy metal band were. Black Sabbath, Black Bird, death and destruction. Shit this is really creepy, he thought. Going round to the back of the car he got his pool cue out of its case and pushed the dead bird off the roof. Black bird, Black Sabbath, Pot Black, seven points, he smiled to himself; Rocky wins the world snooker title, pots the black with an amazing shot at a funny angle to take the title. Deciding to park the car in another bay away from the body of the dead bird, he got back in the car and quickly started the engine, as he drove the car out of the bay he heard a crunching noise as he drove over the dead birds body.

Another parking bay had now became available nearer the entrance so he parked up the car quickly and took the carrier bag from the boot with the bottle of Bells whiskey and six diet cokes, leaving the cue with the bloodstained tip still lying on the back seat where he had left it.

The hotel foyer was busy as it was early evening. Rockyboy made his entrance, his eyes wandered to the bar, a young girl with long black hair and wearing a tight red top showing her well formed breasts was sitting in the far corner on a chromium high stool, her legs went all the way up to her waist. The short white Ra-Ra skirt she was wearing was like a magnet to Rockyboy, he approached the bar; the girl looked up catching his eye.

"Hello." She said, crossing her long legs, the sound of nylon as her legs touched turning Rocky on.

"Hi beautiful, my names Rocky," said Rockyboy, as he held out his hand, “what’s yours?"

The girl took his outstretched hand and held on to it a little longer than normal.

“Laura pleased to meet you." She said, her deep brown eyes twinkling with mischief. Rocky sat next to her, a warm feeling spreading down to his cock, this was a real babe, he thought, how can I get her up to my room and take her to bed.

"So what brings you here tonight Laura?" Said Rockyboy, ordering a large whisky and coke and offering Laura a cigarette. Laura took the cigarette in her long elegant fingers, waiting for Rocky to give her a light. Taking her hand in his and moving his body closer to Laura Rocky lit the cigarette, feeling the electricity surge over his body he knew he had met someone special.

"Fancy having dinner with me later Laura? I am going up for a shower, it’s been one hell of a day babe," said Rocky, downing his drink. Rocky knew that the answer would be yes and he was right.

“I would love to,” said Laura as she took Rock’s card with his room number and mobile phone number on it and put it in her handbag. Rocky stood up and took Laura’s hand in his and kissed her lightly on the cheek.

“Till tonight then.”

“Looking forward to it already Rocky.”

She squeezed Rock’s hand as he turned round and walked away. He seems an interesting guy, thought Laura, makes a change from the usual geeks you meet in these hotels. She was only stopping for the one night on her way to the government meeting in Birmingham to discuss the possibility of a bird flue pandemic. They had discovered the first H5N51 infected bird in Fife about six weeks ago. The locals had left it floating in the harbour for at least a week before they even reported it, dumb fucking locals, she thought. She turned round and saw Rocky enter the lift, nice ass, wonder if I will let him fuck me, she thought as she ordered another large Vodka and fresh orange with plenty. of ice, she noticed the young waiter staring at her nipples as he placed the drink in front of her. Still turn them on at thirty four, she smiled to herself and took a long slow swallow of her drink. Laura was a qualified biologist at twenty and had became an expert in her field, tropical diseases and viruses, by the time she was twenty-nine she was considered one of the best in the world, a genius with looks. For the last five years she had held the position of advisor to the junior government minister responsible for pandemic diseases, Kathy Turner, one of Prime Minister Toby Blain’s Babes. Laura kept herself out of the limelight; she was given her own bio lab in a secluded part of Surrey, with a staff of three. She wasn’t married and at the moment she was too busy to have a regular boyfriend.

Walking straight towards the lift and not looking back he knew that Laura would be ringing him, probably about eight PM. Entering the small confines of the lift his thoughts returned to the events of the day. The dead bird, the lorry driver, something strange was going on and he felt that shudder of dread come upon him again. Rocky used the card to enter the room, sliding it down the slot outside the door, what happened to good old fashioned keys, he thought, as he entered his room. The room was small but modern; a TV with Internet access was on the left wall, on the right a door led to the shower room. Taking off his Parka he hung it up in the small wardrobe with the mirrored sliding door. Emptying the pockets of his black pinstripe Vitero Italian suite, he laid everything on the double bed, his mobile phone, two packets of Marlboro lights and his cheap over the counter disposable lighter, together with some small change and his Burberry wallet. Rocky took off his trousers and hung them up with his jacket in the wardrobe next to his coat. Standing there in his white boxer shorts looking in the long mirror he wondered if Laura would be disappointed. As long as I make her come she will be happy, he thought, as he went into the bathroom, lighting another Marlboro light as he sat on the toilet.

The hot water cascaded over Rock’s body as he rubbed the hotel soap all over his firm body, Rocky was in great shape for a man of his age, he looked ten years younger which was surprising considering the way he had abused his body with drink and girls over the years.

Getting out of the shower he dried himself with the hotel towel and put on his cologne, turning on the TV he switched to the news channel and poured himself a large whiskey and coke. The news was a local station and was concentrating on a huge pile up on the M1 motorway. A lorry had smashed into a white Ford Transit van and caused the death of at least twenty people. As Rocky looked at the news pictures he realised that the lorry probably was the same one that he had given the finger to earlier, he remembered the Tesco logo on the back and the van looked as if it was the same one he had seen in the pub car port an hour or so ago. The feeling of dread was once again on Rocky and he lit another cigarette, he knew he was smoking too much but what the fuck you had to die one day right?

Sitting there dressed in his best casual clothes, designer jeans, Armani top and crocodile shoes, Rocky was looking good, but he did not feel good, something strange was happening, he felt it, he knew something big was going down, but what?

As he strapped his gold Rolex watch on his left wrist Rocky noticed it was five minutes past seven, time for a drink and get the laptop out and check his emails. It was another hour at least before his date with Laura. The room was eerily quite as Rocky sat at his laptop, the blue restful colour of his computer wallpaper starkly silhouetted against the pale lemon of the hotel room walls. The radiator made the only sound, an intermittent clicking, like the slow heartbeat of a mechanical man. He stared at the empty space on his laptop, messages waiting to be read, messages waiting to be sent. Taking a long drink from his glass of whisky and coke he wished he had some ice, he wished he was at home with Jenny and the kids. Adjusting the hotel desk lamp, a long spindly thing that reminded him of the spaceship from The War of The Worlds, he burnt his hand on the hot light bulb. “Shit!” He called out loud and walked slowly into the bathroom. Running his throbbing fingers under the cold water he stared at his face in the mirror. “You look a fucking mess Rocky,” He said, rubbing his chin, his normally sparkling blue eyes were like sunken orbs. His skin was pale and taught looking, but he still looked ten years younger than he should have. The throbbing in his hand was lessening off now and he fancied another smoke.

There wasn’t much to read in the E-Mails, a couple of sales messages from his boss, sales were up, another new branch was opening in London next month and he was looking forward to having dinner with Rocky to see what his thoughts were on the new staff they had hired just before rocky went on his trip. Time to close down the laptop and get some dinner thought Rocky as he logged off and went back into the bathroom to take a leak. Just as he was putting his dick away he heard his mobile ringing. It’s the eye of the tiger, was blasting out from the phone, it was the only ring tone he had ever purchased, had to be done right?, Rockyboy, he thought as he picked up his phone from the bedside table.

Rocky wasn’t born Rocky his real name was Michael, where did the Rockyboy shit come from, he thought, as he answered the phone. Laura was on the line.

“Hi Rocky it’s me Laura, how ya doing,” she said in her very sexy voice. Rocky lit another Marlboro as he whispered into the phone.

“Well good to hear your voice Laura, are you ready for some dinner?”

“I am so hungry Rocky and looking forward to seeing you,” she said, with more than a touch of innuendo.

“I will be down in two minutes babe, see you in the bar,” Rocky hung up and put on his black leather jacket, picking up his Marlboros, lighter,

Would you like to watch a Video of me talking?

2006-09-05T12:10:00.000-07:00

Hi my friends I have just made a vidoe me talking for two minutes about my book. I would like some feedback on the video please. Also I have a special offer up for my very useful software ViralPix and Gallery image software. I have just picked up a nasty flue virus so might have to be in bed for a few days on my own, oh gosh how nasty I think, sleeping on my own.
Here is the link for the video Michaels home Movie

End of Summer

2006-08-31T12:49:00.000-07:00

Is this the end of summer?. As September comes and summers gone so are the memories of holidays long gone. We look forward to the seasons that God gave us, winter, spring, summer and fall. God gave us them all. Want to get some image making software from me Michael Nicolson the rockyboy2 man go HERE
Also on this day the lunatics in Iran decided to carry on with their Nuclear program do we wan't these asholes to ever get a nuclear bomb or should we Nuke em first? A hard question with a hard answer.

MySpace Funnies

2006-08-17T15:45:00.000-07:00

The funniest things you ever will see. Laugh your socks off
MySpace is free visit my blog get your free software just email me here at my private email mailto::doddsnicolson@hotmail.com

Wednesdays news

2006-08-09T15:35:00.000-07:00

I have just enroled in the most Amazing program, I was recommended by my good friend Dan Nickerson of Got Zip, the program is adding a new member at the rate of one every second. do not delay and get your position locked in today.
Here is a letter I sent out earlier today
Thanksxxxxx I will check out your site later,I wish my contacts would
move fast when I tell them its a special, This new program
is an absolute blockbuster. My sponser is my very good friend
Dan Nickerson of Got Zip The most genuine person I have ever met
When he tells you to go, you go and you go fast.
So get in now upgrade and watch the magic tell everyone you
know use my url if you like, it doesn't matter till you
upgrade. I upgraded last night I got this email tonight
Remember fast start bonus will be paid and the Matrix will
fill soon, the stuff you get is also good remember its pre -
launch already 40 thousand in a week. Next cut off is tomorrow
move fast.
Email recieved tonight

Hi Michael

We've got AWESOME NEWS. 7465 Preenrollees and
819 Members have been added to your Powerline since the
last cut off day.

Sunday at Home

2006-07-30T03:50:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone, I have been away from home on another course for three days. It's nice to stay in a hotel and have some quality alone time to think and gather your thoughts. I had some Good Ideas while I was away and now I have to catch up on my e-mails. Over 600 to read. While I was reading them I noticed some good new programs to join, see links on side bar. I took a copy of my novel rockyboy2 The Quest For The Million with me and read it again. It still makes me feel amazed that I did it all by my self including designing the cover. I am working on a new novel right now called rockyboy2 The Quest to Save The World. Hopefuly it will be a best seller.
Well time to go and get a bit of shopping and go swimming if I have time. My beutiful daughter Fiona is back from her trip from Disneyland Paris and looking more beutiful than ever. I must post a photo of my lovely kids on the blog soon.
Thought for today; Its good to get home

Thoughts of Michael on Saturday

2006-07-22T00:22:00.001-07:00

Morning, its been raining in London last night, a welcome interuption to the weatwave. I have the weekend off and I think I will go swimming. I have taken a spot on Dan Nickersons new word site
Dan is the ceo of Got-Zip an amazing community that is linked to your Zip Code. I have purchased a state all to myself Alaska believe it or not for only 59 bucks a month.
The news is full of stories of conflict in the middle east. Why do people kill each other over religion and the colour of their skins. Maybe God will send someone to change things.
If there is life other than us out there no wonder they don't come and say hi, when they look at us lot busy blowing each other up. So here is my thought for today.
Clear your mind of thoughts of hate. Love your fellow man and understand that we are all different but made of the same stuff. Look after the weak, the children and the elderly, spare a word of comfort for the sick and the dying, do at least one good deed for the day and KEEP SMILING.
My lovely youngest daughter goes away to Disneyland Paris next week for her school summer holiday and I will miss her a lot.
Have a nice Saturday Michael Nicolson rockyboy2

2006-07-22T00:22:00.000-07:00

Heatwave hits London

2006-07-19T15:31:00.000-07:00

Today was the hottest day on record in England. Temperatures soared to over 36 degrees. Londoners just grinned and carried on with their daily life, but how silly is it that we can't wear shorts to work? I guess it's the British stiff upper lip culture. I would like to hear your thoughts on this, should we be able to wear dress shorts during a heatwave? As it is Wednesday I spent my usual one pound on the national lottery. What would I do if I won? Go and live in the USA and buy a big house with a swimming pool and meet all my USA friends and family. Tonight's entry is pretty short but at 25 degrees now I am going to get some sleep. Before I go anyone who wants a free copy of my toolbar software take a look here CLICK HERE
God Bless and sleep tight Michael webmaster1

Daughters

2006-07-16T19:52:00.000-07:00

Its Friday night and my son awakens me and tells me my 15 year old daughter is out. It's 3.30 AM what do you do. The panic sets in, has she ran away? who was that boy she was talking to earlier. That little row you had where she said she hates you now. You ring her moblile its on answer, do you call the police, you get angry and worried at the same time. You try to ring again and you notice you have another number for her you ring, she answers, relief , she is outside talking to a boy, you tell her to get back home right now. Your 16 year old son goes out to get her, now you are worried about both of them. You hear the door open, the sound of their voices they are home, worries over. From the moment they are born you never stop worrying about your children. Is it worth it? Too damn right, because thats life and thats love.
God bless our children and keep them safe.
Thoughts of Michael Nicolson the rockyboy2 man

rockyboy2 PixelMyPage: Daughters

2006-07-15T17:18:00.000-07:00

rockyboy2 PixelMyPage: Daughters

rockyboy2 PixelMyPage

2006-07-15T17:15:00.000-07:00

rockyboy2 PixelMyPage

rockyboy2 PixelMyPage: Sunday

2006-06-25T16:42:00.000-07:00

rockyboy2 PixelMyPage: Sunday

Sunday

2006-06-25T15:29:00.000-07:00

The world cup is in full swing and England are into the quarter finals and will play Portugal. We should win by two goals to one. I am having a few days off work to recharge my batteries. I am feeling a lot better now and thanks once again to all those who took out an advert on my pixel site, mostly fellow marketers. It is still only ten dollars for an add 100x100 pixels. If you would like some top quality exposure place your add here

Saturday Night World cup Stories

2006-06-17T12:05:00.000-07:00

Italy v USA I wonder why USA does not have the greatest football team in the world? Considering the size and importance of the USA surely they can get together a world cup winning team. Also watching the team there are little or no Black Americans playing soccer in the USA. Do Americans know that some footballers are earning $300,000 a week in the UK. and Europe, soccer is big business, so come on Mr President get the schools and universities involved.Here in England the Nation is gripped by world cup fever, our team has qualified for the next round but has not played with much flair yet, we will improve in the next few games. My four for the semi finals Germany, England, Argentina, Spain.
The game is going well for the USA at the moment but still no score, good luck USA

Extract from my Novel Rockyboy2 The Quest for The Million

2006-04-02T01:31:00.000-08:00

Copywrite material all rights reserved, do not reprint or use in any way.
THE QUEST FOR THE
MILLION
by Michael NICOLSON
Chapter one
Its Saturday night and time is running out, along
with my money. When did it all start? I can’t
remember exactly. Perhaps if we look back at my
life it will be easier to understand why I am
obsessed with getting on TV to play in the Poker
Million.
I was born in Glasgow in 1948, one of seven
children, four boys and three girls. We were very
poor, probably because my father was a heavy
drinker and gambler. We lived in a single end flat,
on the ground floor of a three story sandstone
tenement building in Govan. It was called a single
end flat because it was one big room, with no
bathroom or toilet. The small toilet was out on the
landing, and shared with the other tenants who
lived on the ground floor opposite us in number
thirty-five.
A young couple with one child, a girl named
Bonnie, who was about the same age as me, and
bonnie a wee lassie she was too, I always had a
crush on her for as long as I can remember. The
toilet door was a pine ledged and braced door, ill
fitting, painted black and hanging on a pair of rusty
tee-hinges, the type of door you would find on a
shed nowadays. It had no windows and was lit by
a solitary light bulb, hanging from a frayed brown
flex in the centre of the room.
Hanging from a six inch nail, driven into the
cream coloured, flaking plaster walls, neatly cut
squares of newspapers tied with a piece of string
through one corner, served as toilet paper. The
toilet seat was missing, so you had to sit on the
cold porcelain. To flush you had to reach a chunky
pine wooden handle, that was attached to a thick
black iron chain dangling about five feet from the
ground. The high level Victorian cistern was black
and had a hideous gargoyle face moulded into the
iron. To reach the chain I had to stand on the
slippery bowl and stretch as high as I could. When
I was a young boy I had a recurring nightmare, I
would slip while stretching to reach the chain, the
Gargoyle would come alive and push my head
deep down into the toilet bowl. While I choked on
the mixture of soggy newspapers and excrement it
would utter its spine chilling laugh, as it pushed
me deeper and deeper into the shit. Before I
drowned I always woke up and cuddled into my
brother, pulling the blankets tightly over my head,
but I never seemed to get back to sleep, I tried to
avoid the toilet as much as I could, especially at
night.
Inside the single end, thirty-four Elder Park Street
Govan, where our childhood dreams and
nightmares took place, the walls were painted pale
blue, with dark blue skirting and architrave's, the
Glasgow Rangers colours. My parents slept in a
big alcove on the left as you entered the room,
with heavy yellow curtains that could be drawn to
keep out the cold. On Sundays they were always
drawn, I think most of us were conceived on a
Saturday night or a Sunday morning. On the wall
facing you as you entered the room was a big
Victorian fireplace, black iron grate surrounded
with four rows of cobalt blue Delph tiles. On top
of the oak mantelpiece was an imitation gold
trophy with a Rangers football rosette attached,
and an old oak wind up mantle clock with a broken
chime, father used to get the big brass key for the
clock from the mantelpiece and wind it up every
Sunday evening, no one else was allowed to touch
it.
Above the mantelpiece was a huge bevelled edge
mirror in a heavy oak frame. I remember my elder
brother Neil standing in front of it when he was
about fourteen, combing his hair and looking like a
proper teddy boy. My father hated the Teddyboy
look and he was always shouting at Neil. Once he
tore up a pair of Neil's jeans with his bare hands,
after Neil had spent hours sowing them, because
they were so tight. Neil hated my father because he
felt he was treated so badly, but on reflection I
think my father just wanted Neil to be something
when he grew up, not end up in prison, running
around with the wrong boys. Neil never saw it that
way, but some of his friends were already drinking
bottles of red wine and getting into trouble with
the law, my father just wanted Neil to grow up
better than him.
In some ways I think my fathers ill treatment of
Neil helped him grow up stronger and eventually
become the fine, strong, family man of integrity
that Neil my brother was. I loved and admired my
big brother unreservedly and miss him more than
words can say.
In the corner of the room was a free standing
white electric cooker, always kept spotlessly clean
by mother. Mothers cooking was to say the least,
basic. Her mince and potatoes were legendary, her
recipe was bung a big load of mince in a pot, let it
cook for a while, then fling in at least five carrots,
peeled and cut into thick slices. Par boiling meant
nothing to mother, she said, "only French people
eat onions."
The carrots were very healthy as they were always
undercooked.
My sister Helen, a fine warm loving girl like her
mother, had simple tastes. From the age of fifteen
she wanted to cook just like her mother, she
invited a rather good looking boyfriend round to
dinner one evening, when we lived in Arden.
Being rather fond of mothers special, mince and
potatoes, she decided to cook the dish for her new
boyfriend. Unfortunately being a little short
sighted, and not wanting to wear her new
spectacles in front of her new love, she
unknowingly cooked him a packet of minced
morsels dog food, enhanced with nourishing
marrowbone jelly, for extra life and vitality. The
boyfriend asked for seconds, he loved it. While
waiting for Helens home baked apple pie and
custard, he unfortunately stumbled on the empty
packet of dog food lying on the kitchen table.
Feeling rather queasy now he made his excuse's
and left, without tasting Helens home made apple
pie or her ample bosoms, he was really 'barking'
mad at Helen, and never saw her again. He would
have been sorry, if he had known then, that Helen
would grow up into one of the most beautiful girls
you have ever seen. She ended up working at the
Bunny Club in London for a while as a waitress, as
did my other sister Katie. Katie won the Miss
Bristows Shampoo contest, the prize was cash,
clothes, and a Lucy Clayton modelling course in
London. My other sister Carol also won a
competition, the most beautiful barmaid in
Scotland contest. Carol had dark hair and was
stunning, just like my mother, she ended up
working for British Airways as an air-hostess.
It was smashing to go out with all three of my
beautiful sisters for a drink, once guys knew they
were your sisters they would buy you drinks all
night, just to get introduced to the girls. I was
always proud of my beautiful sisters and very
close. Now they all live in America we have lost
touch a bit, but that's families for you. I hope we
can all get together again soon and chat about the
old days. Helen is married to an American
schoolteacher, Katie to a Glasgow man, and Carol
also to a Glasgow man. Carol was the last to go to
live in America, her husband Jim is a successful
businessman and they live in Philadelphia. Katie
and Helen live in Rochester, New York State. If
my book is a success we will all go out and visit
them one day.